Nerdy, never scared...

Charlie Brown Musical Junior Year from left to right is Peppermint Patty, Charlie Brown, Snoopy {me!}, Lucy, Linus w/ the blanket, and Schroeder

This past weekend I went to my sister's high school graduation.
the walls of my high school seemed like strangers to me.
my locker was gone.
the cafeteria was completely different.
my band room was gone...
just completely gone 
with some other building partially covering the spot where it use to be.
so many of my high school memories where in that room...or I guess rooms would be more accurate.
maybe you didn't know this about me 
but in high school I was a nerd
drama club president
singer of the National Anthem,
pretend player of the piccolo,
drum line groupie,
 I say nerd proudly
drama club, chorus, band, musicals, plays
I was all about it
we had our own world in high school 
it's not like we were staring at the athletic kids in school thinking
why can't that be me????
my friends were interesting and different.
they enjoyed new things,
 and music, 
and debating, 
the band room was our Friend's coffee house, if you will
that was the place where I ate lunch, 
spent my study halls,
became best friends with my high school boyfriend...
it makes me sad to think that the place where I first heard Les Mis
is just gone

but it got me thinking about Charlie
my baby, not the comic book character picture above : )

We come from a small town
soon we will live in an even smaller town
sports are everything
my husband was kind of a high school sports stud
he played them all
everyone keeps on trying to predict what sports Charlie is going to play
but I just stay quiet
and let them speculate
but inside sometimes I think
what if she takes after me?!?
will people be disappointed
or try to change her mind
because I am just one person
how much influence will I really have
and I don't want to be the mom forcing her own likes on her child
but deep down
part of me wants her to be a nerd
like me
I think most parents want that 
at least a little bit, deep down inside
and nerds are strong
they learn to be different and to be ok with that
nerdy, never scared.
that's my motto {stolen from my sister}
nerds tend to wait on the more adult things like sex
and drinking
it's a little more sheltered existence  
nerds more prone to nights of playing Super Smash Brothers
and watching old episodes of SNL
then breaking curfew 
or other kinds of debauchery 
I think what I want most for Charlie to know
is that it's ok
whatever she chooses to be
it will be ok
that high school is just one part of life
it doesn't really matter
I just want her to be a good person
to treat people, even those different then her, with kindness
and respect
and if she just so happens to do so while singing Annie
then that's just a bonus

*This is a story for those of you who went to high school with me & ryan:  

One day I was looking for something in my basement when I came across something unusual.  It was a large wooden bat.  It was from the Charlie Brown musical which was especially peculiar because Ryan didn't even see the musical in high school {yeah he was one of those that got someone else to sign his program for the extra credit- YES THEY GAVE EXTRA CREDIT TO SEE PLAYS AND MUSICALS- don't even get me started on that one.  Give me some freakin' extra credit to watch a freakin' basketball game then...} anyways, I walk upstairs with the bat and this conversation takes place

Ryan looks at it and exclaims

"do you know what that is?!"

I look at Ryan

"do YOU know what this is???"

"yeah it's a bat we stole to use to paddle the freshman football players!"


me again
"It's the BASEBALL bat from one of my scenes in the Charlie Brown Musical."

"haha, oh yeah we stole it from back stage."

"I can't believe I married you."

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